Roadtrip Therapy

I just did a big road trip to Vegas and back. I took back roads and saw more of our great open country and was surprised by how much I had been missing. I grew up looking out a car window because my Dad was the kind to toss us in the car with some off the wall destination in mind. I've crossed several boarders in Europe at the wee hours of the morning only to see some air show at a castle, buy cheese at a festival, hike a mountain because it's there or find the oldest church with a brass relieve of a knight from the dark ages.

I haven't been out on the road like this last trip for a few years and I forgot how mentally cathartic it is to stare at the scenery or road and really dig into your own mind to get to know myself again. I had also had a tough and good conversation with my brother while out in Vegas so I had plenty to think about on the way home. On the way out it was a lot of "What the heck do I want to do with my life" type thoughts. Should I just get another job, should I buckle down on a project and see if I can sell it, could I sell everything and move out of the country. All of that and more wound around my brain while staring at an endless line of strips slipping through my lights while barreling down the interstate at 2:00am.

On the way back I swung through Zion, Bryce and Capital Reef National Parks over 3 days and was reminded of how small I really am in the world. We have a lot of amazing country out there and my brain was turned on to so many other options in this world and how I could fit into it.

On my final drive into town I got word that I was skipped over for an opportunity in Denver with a fairly new startup. After this road trip it doesn't matter and quite frankly it is probably for the best as I'm ready for something great to find it's way to me vs struggling to find a right fit somewhere.

Letting go

Man, I've been trying to let go of some things for years and it wasn't until I was in the position I'm in now that I have sluffed off a few things. One thing that I had held onto went all the way back to when I was just out of high school. That fell off in January after a friend helped me work through the mental hurdles that I had put in place. The past few weeks I've been getting rid of old paperwork and cleaning out the different spots in the house and when you can toss 4 boxes of crap out of your life it's easier to stand a little taller.

Letting go is physical and mental, I've got another book to read and have read other books in the past about cleansing, organizing and decluttering your life and I know that I mentally feel better when I physically get things out of a pile and either organized or gone. Our brains need the same exercise as well and it's been a difficult process for me to figure out what I need to do to mentally let some things go from my past so I can be a better me and stand a little taller. The harder part with the brain though is you are unable to drop your memories or fuck-ups at Goodwill or in the dumpster. You'll still remember and or know where that body is buried with the trick being to let go of the hold it has on you. Sure, if it's something you need to "apologize" for or say "thank you" then do that, part of letting go is saying or writing something down to get it out of your head.

Part of me letting go mentally is dropping a blog post about something I've had in my head for awhile so if you are reading this, thank you and I appreciate the free session.

The more I read the more I learn. The more I do the better I get.

Reading is one thing, implementing is another thing. You can read a book and glean a lot from it, without practice or practical implementation all you've done is load the data. When we practice what we read and or implement what we read we are actually leveraging new knowledge.

I'm a software developer by trade and practice. I pick up new software or tricks to existing tools in my toolbox on a regular basis. If I read a book, blog post, how to, getting started, etc. it's not until I put code to file and run it that I truly learn something. With software I leverage my experience to learn new software tools and right now I'm digging deeper into NodeJS and am seeing so many different ways to implement that it could be confusing to anyone new to software. New tools and technology are evolving very quickly these days and staying on top of the latest update, paradigm, process or best practice is getting pretty tough.

I don't think a day has gone by that I don't learn something new and in many cases, several things. If everyday is a learning experience then it's a good day.

Creativity or Hacking the Brain

When discussing creativity and or being creative, my mind goes back to college and one of the last classes I took. The professor was writing a book on creativity and was of the opinion that you could teach businesses how to be creative. My profs idea of creativity was turning his briefcase in a different direction on his car seat so he would remember to do something on the way home. The creativity was in coming up with a good trigger to remember to do something.

My understanding of creativity is a little different. I believe that while you can force a team or individual to come up with a better idea using some wonky techniques, a true creative puts out an idea well before it's time or is able to define a whole new way of doing something that no one has thought of before.

Brain hacking is figuring out a trigger that will lead to a different result. Creativity is crafting or thinking up something new without any prompting. While you can help someone be more "creative" it really is hacking their brain to do something they may not normally be inclined to do or figure out.

Why will I work with you?

Many a recruiter will send me a note and say that I'm perfect for a job only to find out that my skills are the only thing that has been considered in the search process. I have a diverse background with several skill sets under my belt and I have a propensity to work with different tools depending on what the current position needs. What brings me to you is not the pool table, foosball table, drinks in the fridge, food trucks at the back door or a brand new Mac. I will ask about the people I'll be working with, the management that will be directing a project and other touchy feely type questions. The people, the management, the atmosphere is more important than the bits and bytes I'll be pushing around because if the people are good, the management is respectful and the atmosphere is open and accepting then the work, no matter the language, will be good work.

Toptal recently came to my attention as an opportunity worth pursuing. There was no offer of power bars in the fridge, best food trucks in town, Ms PacMan in the breakroom and all the sodas I can imagine in the fridge. What Toptal brings to the table is, good people and the opportunity to work with great companies doing great things. I can only assume what the management will be like as that normally takes a project or two to get a real feel for. What I can infer is that the management will have to be great in order to work effectively with such a smart and diverse group of people. As I've worked with international teams before I know that diversity breeds a strong gift of leadership that thrives on getting great people to be even better.

If I have the unique opportunity to work with such a diverse team I will know that the work I've done in the past will only be a great foundation for even better work going forward.

Chance Meetings

I start this with a learning experience. Always have a few business cards on hand, even if you think you won't need them. As someone who normally didn't carry cards around and as someone who is working to get their own business started, I missed an opportunity to hand out my cards to a few people last night at a local art show. I'm a polyglot software engineer that is working on a 3D printing business plan and didn't really expect to meet some folks at the event who would be interested in what I'm working on. So, even as an old boyscout, I wasn't fully prepared for the interest and the opportunity to exchange business cards with possible clients.

I will have a few cards with me no matter where I go now because a missed opportunity could mean a loss of business and that's a loss I do not want to miss out on again.

Getting the water out

I saw this image recently and it struck a cord with me. The basic idea is there and being a boat owner I could relate to the metaphor pretty easily. The person who wrote this down forgot to mention that no matter what you do, water will get into your boat.

When water gets into your boat there are some pretty easy ways to get it out, bilge pump, bucket, water gun, etc. When what happens around you gets in and it will, you need a way to get it out. Everyone is different here so figuring out what your bilge pump is will help you get the crap out when it does get in. Ask yourself what it is that you do that helps you feel better after doing it. Assuming you are not Dexter and have emotions, those things that allow you to feel better are those things that can help you bilge the crap that gets in.

Different people recharge differently so knowing yourself is the best way to determine how to get the crap out, get together with friends, read a book, do some gardening and other things is your personal bilge pump.

Advice vs Perspective

Looking over some notes I found a quote I heard a few weekends ago. I don't give advice, I give perspective. This is, of course, a quote from someone else and I wish I had that reference. If you know it please share.

I had to determine what this meant to me and how to change or update my methods of communicating before I understood the quote better. This is not a call to arms to just stop giving advice or to only hand out your perspective in a situation. There is always a balance and the challenge is finding what that is for each conversation. Your perspective is how you see a situation or conversation or event and it is only your view of what is happening. Your advice would be how to correct or fix or affect the situation or conversation, which in turn means a lack of active listening on my part. A good conversationalist will be able to mirror back your discussion so they fully understand your point of view. Giving a perspective is very similar in that you have to listen to the person talking or pay attention to the situation to be able to have a perspective. And, your perspective may be entirely wrong. 

Having a perspective has given me the ability to listen and observe, better than before and it helps me with my tendency to always want to fix or problem solve something. Having a perspective is also having good active listening skills and many times listening is what's important.

Sharpening the Axe

Everyone is different and everyone will find their own method of recharging. If you don't have a way to recharge, please start looking. A lot of what I've learned about myself as I grew up and am still growing is that if you listen to yourself you can figure out what you need to recharge. The Sharpening of the Axe, a story I heard over the weekend, illustrates how we can all be better, do more things, achieve greater goals and still do great things in the time we have.

I'm not sure if everyone has ever had to sharpen a knife, axe or sword recently so the metaphor may not play out for you. Introverted v Extroverted recovery. Meditation. Yoga. Running. Biking. Binge watching The Daily Show. One of these might resonate and if it does you may know how to recharge. I didn't mention work in that list because if you recharge at work I am unable to relate to that in this post. To work, heads down, no break, no interaction and constantly focused on a single goal is a very hard thing for the body to do. You breath, you blink, you shift in your seat; the body is not meant to be still for a full day at work and neither is your mind.

Each hour of each day, save when sleeping, you should Sharpen Your Axe by pulling back and realizing where you are, stretch a bit, stand up, take a walk, get a glass of water, etc. A few times a day you need to let your mind go somewhere other than work so that subconscious of yours can noodle over the problem you've been working on. Each week you need to get away completely for a bit. Don't look at your phone, answer emails, etc.

When you step away from work you are still working. You are working on you being a better self, partner, co-worker, friend and more. You need a sharper self to be a better self.